A Fistful of Note Cards - March 26, 2017
I admit it. I have OCTYNWD - Obsessive Compulsive Thank You Note Writing Disorder. You may not find it in the DSM-5 yet, but when some psychiatrist reviews my case, s/he’ll find all the proof s/he needs. (Note: The DSM-5 is “the standard classification of mental disorders used by mental health professionals in the U.S.” What they use in Canada, I have no idea.)
How can you tell that a person has OCTYNWD? There is the physical evidence. They buy blank notecards in bulk. (Best price and product I can find is at Chapters/Indigo, but I welcome new suggestions.) They buy stamps in rolls of 100s, and pens in 10s. They print or get printed numerous return address labels. And they always keep their stash close at hand. I have a small table beside me dedicated to that very thing.
What about their personality? Are they guilt-ridden? Is that why they do this? No, they are relief-driven. They tend to have this feeling of dread – that everything is going to go badly. And when it doesn’t, they are so thankful. And when things actually go well – the wonderful Tim Horton’s server puts that half teaspoon and a splash of milk in the large decaf “with a straw please so I don’t pour it down my front” – they are thrilled out of their minds. And just saying “thank you” and paying for it doesn’t seem enough.
Are there any inherent dangers to OCTYNWD? Yes, embarrassment. If you have a Dory-like memory (Dory is the fish with memory deficit - from Finding Nemo), you may find yourself thanking the person by card twice within one week. And then when they comment on it, you feel you ought to write a note of apology – but hesitate, because you might forget you sent one already. And then what would you do?
What is the treatment for this? As with any OCD, the original action is understandable, even necessary. It’s good to wash one’s hands, check that the stove is turned off, be sure the door is locked (if you lock your doors), counting and recounting, and that sort of thing. But doing it four times within a few minutes, not so much. Such people need to discipline themselves to only do “their thing” once and then distract themselves, move onto something new. If possible, something they like. (Hopefully not something else they obsess over, like GoodLife group exercise classes. 😊 Mind you, exercise is supposed to be good for OCD. Oh well…)
OCTYNWD… What should be the daily upper limit? I’m sure there may be a weaning process involved, but likely the goal might be one a day – like a vitamin. (Unless you’re like me and you have a harmless supplement for every possible disorder you could have. Oops. A story for another time.)
But we OCTYNWD-ers are a sneaky lot. What we could do next is include four different things in one card. Some time ago, I received the most amazing card ever. It was a combination of:
-Get Well Soon
-Welcome Back
-Happy Birthday, and
-So Happy You’re in My Life.
I still have it on my fridge as both an inspiration and as an example. 😊
(Another note: I’m really just having fun here. Write all the thank you notes you want. To quote Joshua Becker of Becoming Minimalist, “Maybe the only thing we really need more of is gratitude.”)
How can you tell that a person has OCTYNWD? There is the physical evidence. They buy blank notecards in bulk. (Best price and product I can find is at Chapters/Indigo, but I welcome new suggestions.) They buy stamps in rolls of 100s, and pens in 10s. They print or get printed numerous return address labels. And they always keep their stash close at hand. I have a small table beside me dedicated to that very thing.
What about their personality? Are they guilt-ridden? Is that why they do this? No, they are relief-driven. They tend to have this feeling of dread – that everything is going to go badly. And when it doesn’t, they are so thankful. And when things actually go well – the wonderful Tim Horton’s server puts that half teaspoon and a splash of milk in the large decaf “with a straw please so I don’t pour it down my front” – they are thrilled out of their minds. And just saying “thank you” and paying for it doesn’t seem enough.
Are there any inherent dangers to OCTYNWD? Yes, embarrassment. If you have a Dory-like memory (Dory is the fish with memory deficit - from Finding Nemo), you may find yourself thanking the person by card twice within one week. And then when they comment on it, you feel you ought to write a note of apology – but hesitate, because you might forget you sent one already. And then what would you do?
What is the treatment for this? As with any OCD, the original action is understandable, even necessary. It’s good to wash one’s hands, check that the stove is turned off, be sure the door is locked (if you lock your doors), counting and recounting, and that sort of thing. But doing it four times within a few minutes, not so much. Such people need to discipline themselves to only do “their thing” once and then distract themselves, move onto something new. If possible, something they like. (Hopefully not something else they obsess over, like GoodLife group exercise classes. 😊 Mind you, exercise is supposed to be good for OCD. Oh well…)
OCTYNWD… What should be the daily upper limit? I’m sure there may be a weaning process involved, but likely the goal might be one a day – like a vitamin. (Unless you’re like me and you have a harmless supplement for every possible disorder you could have. Oops. A story for another time.)
But we OCTYNWD-ers are a sneaky lot. What we could do next is include four different things in one card. Some time ago, I received the most amazing card ever. It was a combination of:
-Get Well Soon
-Welcome Back
-Happy Birthday, and
-So Happy You’re in My Life.
I still have it on my fridge as both an inspiration and as an example. 😊
(Another note: I’m really just having fun here. Write all the thank you notes you want. To quote Joshua Becker of Becoming Minimalist, “Maybe the only thing we really need more of is gratitude.”)